Communication
Are you speaking your truth or are you just projecting?
It’s common to see our relationships through the lens of unconscious memories of people from our past (projections), through barriers or walls to intimacy (deflections), through old ideas from the past about who we are (introjections), through shame and guilt (retroflections), or through the opinions of others (confluence). In Gestalt psychotherapy, we call these Contact Boundary Disturbances. All of these disturbances are patterned ways of being in relationships that we developed early in life in an attempt to find safety and keep connection. These were adaptable strategies that helped us when we didn’t yet know how to stand in our dignity and our truth.
Is your relationship a reflection of your wholeness or your attachment wounds?
Sometimes, relationships seem hard. The challenge of negotiating different personas, different desires, different opinions, and different communication styles can be overwhelming. Navigating a relationship with conscious awareness means that we are able to...
Three steps to connecting with people who are difficult to connect with.
It happens all the time: Your child tells you to go away. Your friend wants space. Your in-laws are closed off to deep conversation. Your spouse gets triggered and pulls away. How can we connect with those who don't want connection? 1.) Get curious about your...
Creating Deep Connection in your Relationships
In the past, the way that I have shown up for relationships has prevented me from experiencing deep connection. Even though I am a caring, loving person who is both thoughtful and open, the way in which I hid myself, my experience , and my truth from...
How can you deal with people who trigger you?
Have you ever been triggered? Irritated? Annoyed? Have you ever been jealous? Judgmental? Angry? If you are, in fact, human, you likely answered “Yes!” to all of those questions. I have had countless experiences in my life where I have tried to...
